When clients are experiencing the overwhelming pain of grief, it is a natural instinct to look for a way out of that pain as quickly as possible. Unable to figure out how to get through the pain, they look for a quick ‘way out’.
Imagine standing in a corridor and feeling such overwhelming, debilitating pain. You feel that as long as you stay in that corridor, the pain will not stop. You can see the end of the corridor, so you just want to get there as quickly as possible and escape the pain. You become focussed on the most obvious exit.
When a client’s thoughts focus on the obvious exit at the end of the corridor, they do not notice if there are other ‘doors’ along the way, they fixate on what they think is their only exit. Counselling can help by normalising the client’s thoughts and feelings, hear, acknowledge and validate the painful feelings, and create a safe, confidential space for the client to explore other doors along the corridor rather than focus on what they may think is the most obvious and only exit.